Acceptance and new beginnings

Here we are at the start of a new decade - 2020; it really doesn't seem like 20 years ago when we were welcoming in the new millennium. I hope that you had relaxing and festive Christmas and New Year celebrations. I had a quiet, but enjoyable time and was very well looked after by my friend. Good food, good company and plenty of rest. It's the time of year when traditionally I look back at what I've achieved over the last 12 months and make some plans for the new year ahead. 

Certainly this year hasn't gone to plan health-wise. I naively assumed that once I started on the medication in November of 2018, things would start to return to normal and I'd be back at work by Easter. Sadly that hasn't been the case. The more I research into myositis, the more complex a condition I am finding it to be. It's a rare disease - less than 2 people per million of the population - and within that group of people, there are different kinds of myositis. The antibody that I have tested positive for is particularly resistant to treatment and is also pretty aggressive in its early stages. I've had 53 hospital appointments during 2019, and will be down at King's College hospital again later in the month for more tests and investigations. It severely affects my daily life, as I've lost a huge amount of muscle leaving me weak and exhausted, and I've been unable to work for 18 months. Unfortunately, I've had to make the difficult decision to give up working as my employer was unwilling (reasonably enough, given the length of my absence) to keep my contract open any longer. Accepting this hasn't been easy, and it certainly wasn't the way I wanted my teaching career to end. A friend took me into school this week and I picked up all my things. More than 30 years of teaching resources which I will hopefully be passing on to a recently qualified teacher just starting out in her first year of teaching. 

During my time off work, knitting, crochet and sewing have helped to give my days some structure and routine. I think that I'm proudest of my Good Striations blanket design. To have a yarn company want to print and distribute your pattern is a great feeling. I'm hoping there will be lots more designing in 2020.

The Good Striations blanket was also the kick start to a new fundraising challenge that I have set myself as I decided to donate £1 from each pattern sale to Myositis UK. Thinking back to my Great Yarn Giveaway in 2018, I wanted to do more giveaways, but rather than one huge one, to spread them out over the course of a year. My fundraising page - Fibre 4 Fibres - was created and there will be weekly giveaways each Sunday. The total raised to date is £777. I raised over £8000 with my previous giveaway so it would be brilliant if I could do something similar.

Looking back at my blog entry this time last year, I was relieved to read that I hadn't set myself any specific goals. 2019 was to be a year of nurture and being the best I could be to make Mr JK proud of me. I hope that I've done that. 

So what about 2020? Obviously my first priority is getting my myositis under control and hopefully then stabilising things so that I can work on maintaining what muscle I have got. I'm a firm believer in the saying, 'When one door closes, another one opens,' so I would like to think that there will be some new opportunities for me. Quite in what direction those doors will take me, I don't yet know. But hopefully it's going to be all good. Please come along with me as I find the keys to those doors and see what happens in the coming year. Happy New Year to you and I hope that 2020 is a happy, healthy and peaceful one for you and your nearest and dearest. xxx